Beaumaster: Reducing Violence Against Teens, Young Adults a Duty For All of Us

February 2012 has been proclaimed as National Teen Dating Violence Awareness and Prevention Month. This is especially fitting, since Valentine’s Day occurs in February—a day made for focusing on the relationships dearest to us. The call to awareness on the topic of teen dating violence needs to last and continue through February and beyond, just as we need to work on our most important relationships every day.

One in three teenagers in the US is a victim of physical, emotional or sexual abuse by someone they are dating. Young women, ages 16-24, are three times more likely to experience abuse than the general public. These violent relationships have serious consequences for victims and for our community.   Young people in abusive situations are at a higher risk for substance abuse, eating disorders, risky sexual behavior and even suicide. It is time for our community to become more informed about the seriousness of teen dating abuse and the prevalence of this epidemic around us.

One of every 10 high school students reports physical abuse by a boyfriend or girlfriend. Even more report emotional abuse, which includes shaming, bullying, and threats. Emotional abuse among teens can have lasting impacts on their emotional, physical, and spiritual wellness, including:

• Depression

•Substance abuse

• Physical health complications

• Increased incidence of teen pregnancy

• Greater risk of teen suicide

• Criminal activity

•Chronic health complaints

Dating abuse can also lead to other forms of domestic abuse, including sexual assault. Dating abuse is not the only problem that teenagers face. Bullying, shaming, and threats are the sad realities that many high school and middle school students face in today’s society. Increased public awareness presents hope for helping reduce and prevent such behaviors by encouraging adults to step forward to help students assert their rights to self-respect, safety, and freedom. The old adage “the children are our future” highlights the importance of addressing the issue of teen dating violence head on.  

Look for warning signs that teens you know might be in an abusive relationship.  Because relationships exist on a spectrum, it can be hard to tell when a behavior crosses the line from healthy to unhealthy or even abusive. Use these warning signs of abuse to gauge a teen’s relationship and determine if the relationship is going in the wrong direction:

• Checking girlfriends or boyfriend’s cell phone or email without permission

• Constantly putting boy/girlfriend down

• Extreme jealousy or insecurity

• Explosive temper

• Isolating girl/boyfriend from family or other friends

• Making false accusations

• Mood swings

• Physically hurting boy/girlfriend in any way

• Possessiveness

• Telling girl/boyfriend what to do

Help and support should begin in one’s home and here in our community.  Local churches, schools and other organizations can be a source of strength and hope for teenagers searching for answers in a world that seems overwhelming. For teens that need instant help, grab a phone. Help is just a phone call away. A National Abuse Dating Helpline has been established, offering confidential support to teenagers in unhealthy or abusive relationships.  Unhealthy relationships can start early and last a lifetime - help stop the abuse before it becomes a way of life.

For information and support contact  1-866-331-9474 or Text “loveis” to 77054.

Also visit  www.LoveIsRespect.org. Loveisrespect.org helps teens and young adults, ages 12-24 navigate and identify the continuum of healthy relationship behaviors. From the program, young people learn there are options, answers and support available to them 24/7. Often identifying the problem shines a light on the solution.

We all need to encourage teens who might be in an abusive relationship to contact the Helpline and get assistance to address abuse.  Additional resources are available at www.CDC.gov/features/datingviolence.   

Locally, contact Hope Center at 800-607-2330.

Reducing violence against teens and young adults is a significant duty for all of us. This month, let us all renew our commitment to breaking the silence about dating abuse and fostering a culture of respect in our neighborhoods, our schools, and our homes.